


Staying

by julien (julie)



Category: due South
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1996-07-16
Updated: 1996-07-16
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:35:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21859165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/julie/pseuds/julien
Summary: Fraser has been injured during an undercover assignment, but Ray and Suzanne know how best to take care of him.
Relationships: Benton Fraser/Ray Vecchio, Benton Fraser/Ray Vecchio/Suzanne Chapin
Kudos: 2





	Staying

**Author's Note:**

> **Notes:** This story has a rather strange genesis. You may remember my earlier DUE SOUTH story [THE LIVING YEARS](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20384791)… I wrote a Real Script called [A KISS IS STILL A KISS](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22430854) based on the adventure plot in that, though leaving out the slashy sub-plot. In the script, Suzanne Chapin came back into Ray’s life all-too-briefly (it was a gun-running case, after all). Given that the third season of DUE SOUTH took a different turn, I used that as a spec script instead, hoping to get other work. Meanwhile, as the author of this nonexistent episode, I decided to write the first (and perhaps the only) episode-based slash story. I rather enjoyed that evolution, from a slash story to a Real Script to an entirely different slash story… 
> 
> Each of the three pieces stands alone, however, so you don't need to read the script. Instead: imagine, if you will, Fraser undercover, gun-running for Angeletti. He is discovered and beaten up, but the cavalry (in the form of Ray, Suzanne and Dief) rescue him before permanent harm is done. Once the case is resolved, the four of them return to the Vecchio home, which is peaceful due to Ma and Francesca’s continuing absence in Miami… And now read on!
> 
>  **First published:** 16 July 1996 in my zine Pure Maple Syrup 3

# Staying 

♦

Apparently Benton had spent all afternoon sleeping, for he woke in the dimness of evening, in a house that was both strange and familiar. The Vecchio home. Benton Fraser had been here so often – welcomed to family dinners, and teased by Ray’s siblings – he had helped Ray wash the Riviera in the street, and been greeted by neighbours – he’d held endlessly curious conversations with the children, and sat in comfortable silence while the adults talked. But Benton had never stepped into this guest bedroom before, and he had never slept in this house.

The bed was approximately three times as wide as his own, and it was of course somewhat more ornate. Benton lay there letting his gaze shift around the room, puzzling out the details in the failing light. He didn’t move more than his eyes, for the rest of him was feeling somewhat sore, which he anticipated would only worsen when he moved – though of course he wouldn’t heal if he didn’t move. For now, however, he didn’t even make the effort to push the quilt away, though it was too warm and weighed heavy on him.

Taking stock with one careful hand, Benton found he was dressed in his jeans and singlet. He remembered Ray kneeling before him to work his boots off, then slipping off his socks – the air against Benton’s soles and toes as he stretched his bare feet was a pleasure as always, despite the over-riding discomfort of his injuries. Suzanne had been there, too, briskly arranging the quilt and then pulling the curtains closed, ensuring Benton’s comfort while remaining tactfully in the background. Ray had unbuckled Benton’s belt, and drawn it out through the loops in a long whisper around his waist. Those soft city-hands had dealt quickly with his shirt buttons – when Benton had hurt himself trying to shrug the shirt off his shoulders, Ray had carefully taken charge of that task as well. He’d eased Benton down to lie on the bed, and tucked the quilt around him, blessed the Mountie with a brief smile and his undemanding silence before following Suzanne out, shutting the door behind them.

This room contained so much furniture, and all of it dusted and maintained as neatly as his own. It seemed that the house hadn’t suffered a lack of attention despite Ma Vecchio’s absence – Benton amused himself for a few minutes imagining Ray cleaning and polishing, approaching the domestic tasks with a seriousness and a thoroughness that others might be surprised at – for the cop didn’t always display those traits in his police-work.

Eventually Benton could no longer ignore the demands of the nether regions of his digestive system. He sat up very slowly, listening to the aches that ran scattering through his torso, experiencing again the dull painful blooms – Angeletti’s goons had worked him over quite comprehensively in those long minutes before Ray Vecchio, Suzanne Chapin and Diefenbaker arrived. At the time Benton had tried to withdraw within himself, endeavoured to avoid the immediacy of the situation, but he briefly re-lived it now. His body responded with bruised flesh, with blood vessels broken and muscle compacted. But the damage was simply something he would have to live through. Time would heal him.

At last Benton was sitting on the side of the bed, with his feet planted firmly on the floor. The quilt was now discarded, though the house itself was obviously quite warm. Next was the attempt to stand up. He did so, and swayed through a brief dizzy spell. Interesting the way he lost all notion of where up and down were – such a fundamental sense to manage without. The edges of the furniture glowed blue, which was an even odder symptom, and when he closed his eyes Benton saw nothing but that colour – until at last his balance caught up with his will.

A fairly simple matter then to shuffle across to the door, and open it, and walk oh-so-very-slowly down the hall to the bathroom. A person tended to forget how involved the whole body was in any activity – walking did not require only the use of the legs. A person forgot that until such time as an uncomfortable torso restricted any other kind of movement.

The flush of the toilet must have alerted Ray to the fact that Benton was awake and mobile, for the cop came jogging up the stairs to meet him. ‘How are you feeling?’ Ray asked.

Benton nodded with his brow lifted, intending to convey, _As well as can be expected_.

‘I’m sorry, Benny,’ the cop said for the eleventh time.

‘It’s all right, Ray. I’m all right.’

‘Yes, you are.’ Ray wasn’t quite wringing his hands – he was worrying at a tea towel, though his hands must surely be clean and dry by now, no matter what state they’d been in when Ray had left the kitchen.

The two of them stared at each other for a long moment. There was something imploring in Ray’s dark-hazel eyes, but Benton found himself unable to read it – unless it was a plea for help in unburdening or maybe even aggravating the Italian’s excessive guilt.

‘Look, we’re cooking dinner,’ Ray eventually said. ‘Are you OK to come down and eat? I could always bring a tray up.’

‘I’ll come down.’

‘Great. Oh, and what do you feel like? We’re making lasagne, but if you want something else…’

‘That would be fine, Ray.’

‘Good, that’s good.’ Another unreadable hushed moment as Ray’s gaze searched Benton’s face. ‘I’ll get you a sweater.’ And the cop was already halfway to his bedroom.

‘It’s quite warm,’ Benton said. ‘I’d be comfortable in just my shirt.’

Ray smiled and frowned all at once. ‘You’re warm?’ Benton belatedly noticed that Ray was dressed in a knitted sweater – cotton rather than wool, but a sweater nevertheless. Ray was continuing, ‘Your shirt needs washing. I’ll get you a robe, OK?’

And the cop soon returned from his own room with a silk robe in his hands. He helped Benton into it, first one arm and then the other, so that the Mountie didn’t have to move very much. The silk settled around him with a seductive murmur, cool against the skin of his shoulders and upper arms. Benton had the sudden urge to drag his singlet and jeans off so he could experience the silk against the rest of him – but he stifled it, anticipating Ray’s ridicule and his own embarrassment. Imagining them as vividly as the pleasure, if not more so.

It was just as well the cop was there beside Benton as they walked down the stairs, for that blue glow returned to outline the banisters. Benton kept one hand on the railing, grateful for Ray’s hand providing gentle support at his other elbow, and the Mountie grimly waited out the dizziness. And then – sooner than seemed possible – they were in the kitchen, and Ray was getting Benton settled at the table.

‘You’re all right?’ Ray asked.

‘Yes, thank you,’ Benton replied, glad to be sitting down. Diefenbaker roused himself to come over to check on his human friend. ‘I’m all right,’ Benton told him, speaking clearly. The wolf must have agreed with this assessment, for he soon returned to slumber in the new home he’d found in the corner of the Vecchio kitchen.

Benton looked around him, and met Suzanne Chapin’s direct gaze. ‘Hi,’ she said. ‘Can I get you a drink? Coffee?’

‘Tea, please,’ he said. ‘Chamomile, if possible.’

‘Yeah,’ Ray said over his shoulder from where he crouched by the oven. ‘Tea bags are with the sugar and stuff, Suze, but up the back of the shelf.’

She’d already filled the kettle and set it going, obviously familiar with this place. After rummaging around in the pantry, stretched up on the tips of her toes, Suzanne declared, ‘Got it,’ and emerged with a small box, looking rather pleased with herself. ‘You know, there are a hundred different types of herbal tea hidden away back there.’

‘Ma gets them in for Benny. Buys a different type each week, she can’t resist all the weird ones. I think they appeal to her sense of the absurd.’ Ray stood up. ‘Lasagne’s going to be ready in about quarter of an hour. You hungry?’

‘Yes,’ said Suzanne.

Benton nodded, as firmly as Suzanne had expressed herself. She must have read that, for within moments she silently handed him a plate with a thick piece of buttered Italian bread. ‘Thank you kindly,’ he said, before munching into it, pausing only to gulp down a mouthful of the tea as soon as Suzanne put the mug on the table. It was too hot, of course, but it tasted divine.

Ray was watching him, hands on his hips. ‘Don’t suppose you’ve eaten since yesterday.’

‘Breakfast yesterday,’ Benton confirmed, though his mouth was full. His grandmother would have told him off for such bad manners.

‘Did you get any sleep last night?’

Benton shook his head in the negative.

‘Well, no wonder you’re feeling poorly. Sleep and food, that’s what you need. Just as well you came here, a good solid Italian meal will set you right.’ Ray glanced at Suzanne, who was busy cutting and buttering the rest of the bread – he addressed his next remark to her. ‘I think he’s running a bit of a fever, though.’

‘Yeah?’ She walked over to Benton, and before he had the chance to protest she curved the palm and fingers of one hand cool against his forehead. ‘He is warm,’ she agreed. Benton stared up at her, feeling a little off balance though her touch was quite business-like – friendly in the intent rather than in the execution. Though he was seated, she was short enough that he didn’t need to tip his head back far to see her. ‘You’re healing, right?’ she asked him. Her eyes reminded Benton of a strong sea running on a stormy day. ‘His body’s working in overdrive to heal,’ Suzanne said to Ray, ‘that’s all.’ And she offered Benton a reassuring smile, running a hand back through her beautiful golden-brown hair, before returning to finish with the bread.

‘You’ll be all right, Benny?’

He nodded in reply. Food would be very welcome right now, and then perhaps some more sleep. Though the idea of simply sitting here all evening in this warm kitchen while his friend and Suzanne Chapin bustled around together in comfortable concern – that idea was very appealing.

‘I don’t know,’ Ray said, still worrying over him. ‘You’re holding yourself all wrong, Benny. Kind of stiff. That’s not like you.’

‘He’s been hurt, Ray.’

‘Yeah, but holding himself all tensed up like that ain’t gonna help anything.’ Ray considered Benton for a moment. ‘I’ll give you a massage after dinner if you want, a proper one. I mean, I haven’t done that since I used to play serious basketball, but I was pretty good, I knew what I was doing. What do you reckon?’

Benton had finished the bread now, and he sat there contemplating this offer with the hot mug of tea wrapped in both hands. Off balance at another intimacy with friendly intent. ‘I’d appreciate that, Ray,’ he eventually said.

‘Good.’

Suzanne said, ‘Vecchio, if you still want that salad you’d better get making it now.’

‘Sure, Suze.’ And the cop and the special agent busied themselves over preparing the finishing touches to their meal.

Benton watched as Ray gathered salad vegetables and a bottle of lemon juice from the refrigerator, adding a packet of nuts from the pantry. Suzanne located a large decorative bowl on her second guess at which cupboard it would be in, and then began chopping the vegetables. The two of them functioned efficiently together, which Benton enjoyed watching. It seemed that Benton Fraser was not the only person Ray could work in partnership with – and while that observation brought with it a tiny stab of jealousy, Benton was generous enough to feel happy for his friend. Ray was far lonelier a person than he deserved to be.

The platter of bread was brought to the table – Benton stole another slice to munch on – along with the salad. Suzanne sorted through the cutlery drawer with quick fingers while Ray served slices of lasagne onto three plates. Diefenbaker must have already been fed, for he barely stirred despite the delicious and complex aromas of dinner. Suzanne came comfortably close as she placed a knife on the table just by Benton’s right hand, reached across him to deposit a fork. Her hair fell before him in a silken curtain for a moment, then she tossed it behind her shoulder again.

And then the three of them were sitting around Benton’s end of the table, tucking into their meals with quiet enthusiasm. No one spoke until they’d all blunted the edge of their hunger. ‘More lasagne?’ Ray asked, and he served up another slice to each of them.

‘This is very good, Ray,’ Benton offered. He’d eaten many wonderful meals in the Vecchio home, but this was one of the most satisfying.

‘Of course it’s good – Ma taught me.’ Ray cast him a mischievous glance. ‘It annoyed the hell out of Pop that I could cook better than Franny.’

‘It’s delicious,’ Suzanne said, reaching across the table for a moment to grasp Ray’s hand in gratitude. She snagged another piece of bread on her return.

Another comfortable silence as they dealt with the second serve of lasagne. The sauce was rich meat and light tomato, layered with mozzarella and parmesan and wholemeal pasta. It contrasted well with the crisp salad and tangy lemon dressing.

Eventually they all slowed to a halt. The cop and the special agent each sank bonelessly down in their chairs. Benton suspected the two of them were playing foot-to-foot beneath the table. ‘Coffee,’ said Ray, apparently unsure himself whether that was an offer or a demand.

‘Coffee,’ Suzanne agreed.

‘That would be pleasant,’ said Benton.

‘You feeling better?’ Ray asked him, apparently finding it an effort to even swing his head in Benton’s direction.

‘Yes, thank you.’

‘Still too warm?’

Benton nodded apologetically, though the warmth felt healthier, as if it now had more to do with digesting the meal he’d just eaten. His sense of balance felt far more grounded, which was quite a relief. Perhaps that eerie blue glow wouldn’t return.

At last Ray dragged himself to his feet, and put the kettle on. When Suzanne made a move to help him, he waved her back down. ‘Don’t worry,’ he said. He brought three mugs over to the table, took the plates over to the sink. Fetched the ground beans from the refrigerator and measured them into the coffee plunger. ‘Did you get your report finished, Suze?’

‘Yeah.’ She reached one hand to drag the lap-top computer down from the other end of the table, and she contemplated the little screen. ‘I need to proof-read it, but I think it’s done.’

‘What did you say about Benny?’

‘Don’t worry, Vecchio, I gave him all the kudos.’ A few taps of her finger as she paged down to the relevant part, and then she quoted from her report. ‘ _Constable Fraser found the assignment challenging, but approached it with great courage and determination. His demonstrated insight, versatility and initiative were instrumental in achieving a successful outcome. His contribution was particularly commendable given that the opportunity presented to him did not allow for any significant preparation time._ Will that do?’

‘I suppose,’ Ray said grudgingly.

‘Well, if you want it written any more glowing, bring those fingers over here.’

Benton lifted one hand to forestall any such activity. ‘Thank you kindly, special agent. I believe that you have been more than generous already.’ He returned her lovely smile. ‘And of course you also mentioned Ray’s contribution…?’

‘Of course.’ She frowned at the screen. ‘ _Detective Vecchio brought his considerable courage, wit and energy to identifying this opportunity, and to quickly devising and implementing a plan to take advantage of it. He provided vital support to Constable Fraser, and worked co‑operatively with the ATF_. Then I go on to say that the blend of inter-agency relationships and resources made for a unique and highly effective team.’

Ray was smiling broadly. ‘Yeah, we make a great team. Welsh is going to have to hand out gold stars all round.’ The kettle came to a boil, and Ray poured the water into the plunger, then brought it over to the table.

Into the quiet, Suzanne said, ‘Ray, I’ll have to leave tomorrow. My only excuse for staying was to finish the report.’

Benton watched for Ray’s reaction, but the cop sat there silently, his eyes downcast.

Suzanne reached to clasp his hand again. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘No, don’t be sorry,’ Ray at last said, ‘I knew you were going. And I love you anyway.’ The man smiled a little, and lifted his head to meet Suzanne’s gaze. ‘I’m not saying that to make you feel bad. I’m just used to the women I love not staying around for long.’

Hard to sit here while Ray was being so brave and so vulnerable, while he and Suzanne shared this difficult and intimate moment. Impossible to know what to say or do to help the situation – and there was probably nothing Benton could do or say anyway.

Ray was pouring the coffee now. ‘You know,’ he said, ‘my friends don’t hang around for long either. Fraser will probably be going back to Canada soon enough.’

‘No,’ Benton said quickly. Then he thought about it, for this response had surprised even him. ‘I don’t believe so,’ he confirmed.

Another smile from the cop, stronger now, and rather pleased. ‘Good,’ he said. The three of them sat there and drank the coffee, while Ray and Suzanne held hands across the table. Diefenbaker whuffed in his sleep a couple of times, shifting restless. Ray said, ‘He’s chasing bad guys in his dreams. He’s taking chunks out of Angeletti’s goons, and seeing what Italian mobster tastes like.’

Suzanne laughed, and lifted Ray’s hand to her lips for a moment. ‘I’ll make a start on the washing up,’ she suggested. ‘Why don’t you go take care of Fraser? I think your friend needs some serious relaxation.’

‘Yeah, sure. Benny?’

He nodded, swallowed the rest of his coffee, and slowly stood from the table. The food and the pleasant atmosphere seemed to have made all the difference – Benton found his torso was still stiff and sore, but he had regained his equilibrium, and felt quite solidly based now.

As Benton began to walk out of the kitchen under his own steam, he was aware of Ray lingering behind in order to gather Suzanne up for a passionate kiss. Sad to know his friend would lose this woman again, when they already seemed to have found some measure of contentment between them. Maybe this was usual for Ray, maybe he was this loving and gentle with all the women in his life. Though perhaps not – Ray seemed so appealing in this regard that Benton couldn’t quite understand why those women would then keep leaving the man.

Ray caught up with him just as Benton reached the stairs. Again the cop provided surreptitious support with a soft-skinned hand at Benton’s elbow. They scaled the stairs in silence. ‘All right?’ Ray asked once they’d reached the top.

‘Yes,’ he replied. And he was feeling better. Though every step brought discomfort, the mere fact that he was moving around helped loosen Benton up.

‘Good. Come to my room, my stuff’s there. OK?’

‘Yes.’

Benton gave himself over to Ray once they were in the man’s room, though that required conscious effort. The cop hadn’t thought to shut the door, but the Mountie let that go. Bypassing the main light, Ray turned the lamp by the bed on, which provided a soft and warm glow. All was quiet efficiency as Ray slid the silk robe back off Benton’s shoulders, eased the singlet up over his head and down his arms. The quilts on the bed were pulled back, and a large fluffy towel was spread over the bottom sheet – and then Benton was encouraged to lie down. ‘On your front,’ Ray said into the hush, ‘I’ll start with your back.’

The cop helped Benton to get comfortable – lying in Ray Vecchio’s bed, with his face in his friend’s pillow. Benton turned his head to the other side so that he could watch Ray as he heeled his shoes off, dragged off his sweater and rolled up his shirt-sleeves. And then Ray was searching through first one bedside drawer and then another, at last emerging with a bottle of something.

‘Now if you were a stranger,’ the cop murmured, ‘I’d stand here and lean over you. But the bed’s a bit low, that wouldn’t be so great for my back. So is it OK if I get on the bed and kneel over you?’ A long pause through which Ray didn’t move. ‘Benny? Are you OK with this?’

‘Yes,’ he whispered. Perhaps Ray hadn’t heard him the first time. Perhaps Benton hadn’t voiced the word. ‘Yes.’

‘That’s good, Benny, that’s just fine.’ Gentle reassurances as his friend knelt on the bed and then eased a leg over to straddle Benton. The insides of Ray’s thighs against Benton’s hips, pressing hot despite the trousers and jeans they wore. Ray’s tender city-hands soothing cool oil of some kind across Benton’s shoulder-blades and then beginning to work it in. ‘That’s all right, Benny, this is going to be all right.’

‘Yes, Ray,’ he whispered again, for it seemed that Ray was nervous of this intimacy as well. The scent of sandalwood rose as Benton’s shoulders and Ray’s hands warmed the oil.

Pleasant at first, and relaxing, as Ray worked on his shoulders and neck. Good as Ray moved down Benton’s spine, one vertebra at a time, moved back up either side of his back easing the muscles. Ray’s thighs gripping Benton’s hips and buttocks with innate strength as the cop unconsciously sought to balance himself, every now and then sitting back and resting his own buttocks against the back of Benton’s thighs. Which created confusing responses in Benton, but at least provided teasing sensual distraction from the long minutes that Ray spent working over the few knots of tension. No one had ever done this for Benton before, so he hadn’t quite known what to expect, but it seemed a massage wasn’t all luxury – at times it hurt, though it was a good kind of hurt because Ray coaxed the tension away, and let Benton ease into comfort.

At last Ray whispered, ‘OK, Benny, let’s get you turned over.’ The cop shifted, and then was standing by the bed, towering tall. Benton’s nether regions were cold and bereft where Ray’s thighs had held him. ‘I’ll work on your chest and belly,’ Ray continued, ‘but I warn you now it’s going to be a bit painful. Should help the bruising heal quicker, though.’

‘Cruel to be kind,’ Benton offered.

‘Yeah,’ Ray breathed with a laugh. ‘All right so far?’

‘Yes.’ He turned his head away, and caught a glint of richness on the other pillow. Curious fingers reaching to discover a long strand of spun gold. Benton shifted up onto his elbows – which painfully but usefully stretched his stomach muscles – and lifted the hair to the light so he could examine its riches.

‘Suzanne,’ Ray said, crouching by the side of the bed to also stare at this trace evidence. ‘She has the most beautiful head of hair.’

‘Yes.’

‘She stayed over last night. While you were driving to Toronto and back. She stayed with me.’

‘I’m happy for you, Ray.’

‘And she’s leaving again tomorrow.’

Benton reverently dropped Suzanne’s hair to the pillow again. ‘You love her,’ he observed.

‘Yeah. Yeah, I do. But that’s a good thing, right?’

‘I don’t know,’ he replied. Though that wasn’t quite the truth – Benton thought it was a wonderful thing that Ray had so much love in his heart, and that he was prepared to share it with others despite the fact that Ray expected them to leave him behind. Benton himself wasn’t quite that brave.

With Ray’s help, Benton carefully eased over so that he was lying on his back, and then Ray straddled him again. Face to face and groin to groin. Almost too confronting, definitely confusing. Ray’s hands gentle on Benton’s shoulders and chest. Careful now, to avoid exacerbating the hurt of his injuries.

‘It is a good thing, Ray,’ Benton finally said, hoping to distract himself from the pain of Ray’s hands and the pleasure of Ray’s thighs. If Benton let his own hands fall where they’d be most comfortable, he’d be caressing the man’s knees – instead he let his hands lie on the bed to either side. ‘It is a good thing that you love Suzanne.’

‘Why?’

‘Because it means you are a generous man.’

‘I guess.’ Those tender hands were working down Benton’s ribs now, Ray keeping track of every time that Benton winced. ‘I’m sorry,’ the cop muttered, ‘but you should feel better for it afterwards.’

‘I am sure that one day soon someone will want to stay with you, Ray.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yes,’ Benton firmly replied.

Ray was frowning now, perhaps considering this assertion and finding it difficult. His hands, though, remained gentle as they shifted slowly down to Benton’s stomach. There wasn’t much room to work between Benton’s ribs and the waistband of his jeans, but Ray did his best to ease the muscles there. Frankly, Benton was finding this frustrating, given that those muscles stretched down below the denim, and Ray had been doing so well in easing the aches and pains elsewhere. At last Ray murmured, ‘Look, is there any chance of you letting me undo your jeans? If I can get a little lower, I can do this properly.’ The cop at last met the Mountie’s gaze. ‘Sorry if this is too much for you, but –’

‘It’s all right, Ray.’

Nimble fingers unbuttoning, unzipping, encouraging Benton to lift his hips so that Ray could slip the denim, and the cotton of Benton’s boxer shorts, down a few centimeters. ‘OK?’ Ray asked.

‘Yes, Ray.’ To be honest, his most private parts were arranged a little uncomfortably now, caught down by his own thigh – but there was no way Benton was going to do anything about it despite Ray’s tactful question. Instead, Benton closed his eyes and let Ray finish his task. The Mountie really felt quite sluggishly relaxed, and the late evening either sped by or crawled by, he wasn’t sure which. Perhaps after a full night’s sleep his body would be as nearly healed as possible.

‘How’s that feel?’ Ray murmured at last. The cop was sitting back against Benton’s thighs.

When Benton opened his eyes he found that Ray was surveying Benton’s exposed torso. ‘It feels good now that you have stopped, Ray.’

The man laughed, reaching for a corner of the towel to wipe his hands on. ‘Well, I guess that means I’ve done it all right. If you want me to do your back again, that might help you forget that the front hurts.’ Those tender hands now resting lightly against Benton’s stomach.

Which sounded like an offer of complete hedonistic indulgence. Benton said, ‘Ray, that’s really not necessary –’

Suzanne was there, standing in the doorway.

Benton watched her walk into Ray’s bedroom – he was feeling somewhat vulnerable lying there half-naked between his friend’s thighs. ‘I think I’ll retire for the night,’ Benton said.

Suzanne drew closer, walking around the foot of the bed, watching both the men watching her. Long thick silken hair catching the light and spinning it into gold. Expression serious and unreadable.

‘Thank you kindly for the massage, Ray, but if you’d let me up –’

She was standing next to Ray now, and Ray was looking at her, utterly mesmerised.

Benton lifted himself up onto his elbows. ‘Ray, no doubt you’d like to be alone with special agent Chapin.’

The two of them were kissing. Passionately. Ray was sitting there on his friend’s thighs, kissing Suzanne with an intensity that Benton found fascinating. Disturbing. Ray and Suzanne were both so beautiful and so strong, each in their own way, and when they kissed it was like a storm breaking. Beautiful to watch, but dangerous – Suzanne’s hair falling to hide their faces one moment, and then shifting back to reveal them both with the suddenness of a flash of lightning. Ray lifted one hand to caress her throat.

Benton struggled to sit up, to pull himself away, but he was held still by the lightest of touches – Ray’s other hand spread palm down on Benton’s stomach.

‘Stay. Stay right where you are, Benny.’ Ray had broken the kiss, and now looked directly at Suzanne. ‘You want him to stay, right?’

‘Yes.’ Beautifully rough voice.

Ray was smiling. ‘Oh, we’re all grown up now, special agent,’ he said mockingly, misquoting her own words. ‘Maybe we can share?’

‘Yes,’ she said again.

‘Benny?’

Both of them looking down at him, asking for his consent. This was all entirely confusing. Benton had never really considered such a thing happening for him, not in this lifetime. But that was less to do with any reluctance on his part – and far more to do with assuming there would never be the opportunity, never the right people, never even the remotest possibility. ‘I never thought,’ he stammered out in an attempt at explanation, as they both waited patiently, ‘I never thought there would be anyone I could do that with –’

‘You mean any-two,’ Ray suggested. Suzanne laughed quietly, and the cop drew her closer with an arm around her waist.

‘Any-two,’ Benton echoed, feeling foolish. He sank back down to lie on the bed, head resting on Ray’s pillow. Neither Ray nor Suzanne read that as defeat, or pushed him – and their humour wasn’t cruel.

‘Hey, if it’s any help,’ Ray said very gently, ‘I’ve never done this either. Not a threesome. So you and I will both be making it up as we go along. OK?’

Benton frowned up at the man, and muttered, ‘Where did you learn to be this brave?’

‘I don’t know, Benny. I don’t think of myself as brave.’ But he was, Benton reflected – Ray was brave and strong and oh-so-very patient right now.

Patient, because Ray wanted this and yet he didn’t push. Ray wanted this, and Ray was Benton’s best friend, and Benton wasn’t averse to the idea. No, that much was very clear to him – Benton was not averse to the notion. And perhaps this would be the only time in his entire life that such a thing would be at all possible.

A unique and exquisite situation. And Benton really didn’t want to let Ray down. At last the Mountie nodded once, tentative but willing. ‘Yes,’ he said.

Ray’s beautiful smile broadened. He looked absolutely delighted – that was blessing enough as far as Benton was concerned. But even then the cop said, ‘You can stop this any time you want, all right? If it gets too weird for you…’

Suzanne interrupted him. ‘Your friend _does_ have an imagination, Ray,’ she said dryly.

Benton nodded agreement again. In fact, under the continuing confusion his imagination was already running riot and throwing various surprising scenarios at him.

‘That’s good, that’s fine,’ Ray was saying. He added with a chuckle, ‘I guess we’re going for the full Italian cure-all here – sleep, food and sex.’

‘Vecchio,’ Suzanne said, ‘don’t you ever shut up?’

‘Give me something better to do with my mouth, Suze,’ the cop suggested.

‘In your dreams.’ Instead she moved to straddle Benton where he lay on the bed, settling herself in front of Ray. While she snuggled back against the cop, her attention was really focussed on the Mountie. A hand either side of his chest, and she was leaning close – all that beautiful hair cascading to surround him, according them a moment of privacy. ‘Constable,’ she said in her husky voice. ‘Fraser?’ she asked, and then she tried, ‘Benton.’

‘Ben,’ he offered.

‘Ben.’ And she leaned down even further – not letting her weight rest against his chest – and her mouth met his in a careful kiss.

Which was really very nice, and it had been such a terribly long time since Benton had kissed anyone, but he couldn’t quite let himself get caught up in it, not yet. When the kiss broke, he gave Suzanne a reassuring smile, and said, ‘Ray?’

‘I’m here,’ the man responded. And Ray shifted down to lie beside Benton – up on an elbow, but a safe few centimeters away.

Confusing. Ray loved this woman – how could he not feel jealous when she kissed Benton? There had to be some way of the three of them being fully involved in this, and not leaving anyone out.

‘Isn’t she beautiful?’ Ray was looking up at Suzanne, of course, and the man seemed as enchanted by her as ever. Though he said, ‘Let me see you kiss her, Benny.’

It felt stupid to ask under the circumstances, but Benton had to. ‘You don’t mind?’

‘No,’ Ray murmured, sounding kind of fond and indulgent. ‘You’re my best friend, Benny, I don’t mind sharing with you. In fact, right now, I really _want_ to share this gorgeous woman with you, OK? And I want to share you with her.’

‘Yes,’ he said. And when Suzanne leaned close again, Benton lifted his arms to welcome her.

It began then. Benton gave himself over to these two friends of his, gave himself so thoroughly to Suzanne as she kissed him with all the passion he’d seen her bless Ray with. Beautiful. He heard Ray laugh happily, and then shift on the bed.

Seemed that the cop had decided to take on the responsibility for undressing the three of them. When Benton’s mouth was freed again, he found that Ray himself was naked to the waist and working on unbuttoning Suzanne’s shirt. Benton took the opportunity to reach up and run fingers through that lovely gold-brown hair, feeling the silky texture of it so rich and vibrant, gathering and crushing resilient handfuls of it. The shirt was gone, and then Ray lifted a cotton camisole off over her head – her hair spilled down again to hide the lace of her bra – but then that was gone, too, and she was kissing Benton again and her lovely breasts were teasing his chest. Fingers tangled in her hair, palms against the soft skin of her back, the spicy scent of her mingling with sandalwood.

Benton scarcely even minded when Ray began dragging off the Mountie’s jeans. The jeans that the cop had already had the nerve to unfasten. He was left with his boxer shorts for modesty – not that they would have hidden Benton’s excitement from Ray – while Ray shifted back beside Benton. Suzanne did the honours by leaning over to help dispose of Ray’s trousers, and then his briefs. Benton didn’t quite know where to rest his gaze. It wasn’t that he wasn’t eager to look at his friend from this new perspective, but Benton felt embarrassed. And it certainly wasn’t that Ray seemed to know any shame – the cop was still laughing happily under his breath.

Ray hauled Suzanne down into his arms, turning her so that she still had her back to him. ‘Can you sit up, Benny? Come here and help me get her jeans off.’

He did so, kneeling before them. And when the other two were both naked, Benton pushed off his shorts and let them fall to the floor.

Dazed confusion. Ray seemed to be choreographing this, providing some guidance. Benton simply followed his suggestions whether verbal or physical. It was good. So much joy to be had just from feeling another human being’s skin against his own. Joy to be had from Suzanne’s luxurious skin, and all that wonderful hair – for Ray seemed to ensure the woman was always there between the two men, and Benton didn’t insist on anything else for it only seemed fair that he and Ray both concentrate on Suzanne’s pleasure.

At some stage later when Benton was nearing the end of his patience, he found himself sitting cross-legged, and Suzanne on all fours kissing him still, while deft hands – Ray’s hands – rolled a condom onto Benton’s neediest organ. So this was how it would be. Benton moaned a little, let Suzanne uncross his legs, shift closer to straddle him, and then oh-so-delightfully begin to impale herself on him. Was it ridiculous for a grown man to feel this overwhelmed, this light-headed, due to nothing more than this simple act? Benton moaned again as Suzanne dropped her head back. Ray was shifting closer, his legs each sliding under Benton’s cocked knees so that the two men held her close between their interwoven limbs. The cop’s hands cupped Suzanne’s breasts, while Benton’s cupped her buttocks. Ray bent his head forward to fasten his mouth to the base of her jugular vein – and Benton watched his best friend, wanting to run a hand over that finely shaped skull, feel Ray’s cropped hair tickle his palm. The Mountie restrained himself, and returned his attention to Suzanne and all she was doing to him.

Which may have been a mistake, for soon Benton felt the inevitability of completion. ‘No,’ he whispered in protest. But his friends encouraged him, murmuring _Ben_ or _Benny_ , and it was upon him. Almost too intense to be called pleasure, these waves that crashed through him. He clutched Suzanne close, thrust up into her with surprisingly little regard for anything but his own haven. It was incredible. And she evidently forgave him for his selfishness, because she held him gently, and accommodated his last shuddering surrender. Kissed him back to consciousness.

Ray had withdrawn a little, was apparently rolling a condom onto himself. Suzanne pulled away and dealt neatly with Benton’s before he could think of it. And then Ray was gathering the woman back into his arms, lying on his side and entering her from behind. Benton watched bemused, enjoying the sight of Suzanne’s compact but womanly body stretched before him, Ray’s hands holding her close to him as he thrust slowly but eagerly. She had rather long and very shapely legs.

‘Benny,’ Ray said. ‘I bet you can think of something to do with that tongue of yours.’

Suzanne moaned, echoing Benton’s anticipation of pleasure. He knelt and leaned forward, first licking at a nipple, gently tugging on it with his teeth. Then he shifted lower, and began delving into that secret place of hers, hidden away amongst more golden-brown hair. Benton ended up lying on his side, upside down compared to his friends, face happily buried between Suzanne’s hips and thighs. Tongue exploring the neat folds of flesh, tasting the spiciness, revelling in her juices. Nose so close to Ray as he thrust himself within her. The smell of rubber, and Suzanne’s cinnamon sex-scent, and Ray’s as well.

Tempting to tease his friend with his tongue as well, to discover how Ray’s delicate-meat-sauce smell translated into taste. To encourage the man’s completion by licking at his testes. But Benton restrained himself and concentrated on Suzanne.

He reached a hand down to caress her breast, and discovered Ray’s nimble fingers already playing with her nipple – so after a brief drag of his palm across both Ray’s fine skin and hers, Benton brought his hand back to grasp Suzanne’s hip. Which was just as well, for as a result of the efforts of the two men Suzanne was soon shuddering in completion, trembling and trying to curl up, but Ray and Benton held her steady enough to work through the last of her pleasure.

And in the heightened confusion Benton found his hand spread on Ray’s hip instead, crushing both of his friends to him, palm slipping round to fit the curve of Ray’s neat buttocks – Suzanne’s hot wet secrets pressed against Benton’s throat now, as his face pressed into her thighs – and Ray was taken by the pleasure, choking out, ‘No, Benny… Suze… My God!’

Long moments as the immediacy of their reactions ebbed away into peace. It was only then that Benton remembered his bruised torso. Suzanne encouraged him to turn right-way-up on the bed, helped Benton ease his head down to Ray’s pillow. He lay on his back, and she curled up to his side, one leg bent to possess his. And Ray stretched out beside her, pressed up close against her, both of them tucked under Benton’s arm so that he could rest his hand on Ray’s far shoulder.

Silence for a while, and no one searching for the words to break it. The heaviness of three bodies as utterly relaxed against each other as it was possible to be – so close that they could have fitted together like this on Benton’s narrow bed. Yes, peace, except that Benton’s chest and stomach were uncomfortable.

Perhaps Ray somehow knew that, for eventually he asked, ‘Benny? You OK?’ His face still hidden behind Suzanne, still buried in her golden-brown hair.

‘Yes, Ray.’

Or perhaps the cop had been more worried about Benton’s reaction to what they had just done, for Ray now asked, ‘Are you still hurting?’

‘Yes, Ray.’

Silence for a moment before Ray dragged out the best offer he could. ‘Would another massage help? I’ll find the energy somewhere.’ And the cop’s hand slid gracefully from the special agent’s hip to the Mountie’s waist.

‘I don’t think so, Ray. Who knows what it might lead to.’

Suzanne laughed. ‘Sounds like a challenge to our ingenuity, Ray.’

The peace remained, though Suzanne initiated long lazy kisses, first with Benton and then with Ray, and then Benton again. The Mountie managed to ease up onto his side, so that he and the cop were facing each other, with this beautiful woman caught between them. She shifted and stretched, rubbing up against both men in the most sensuous of dances. When Benton’s mouth wasn’t being possessed by hers, he buried his face in her abundant golden-brown hair and breathed in the cinnamon scent of her. Breathed in the intoxicatingly masculine scent of his best friend woven in with Suzanne’s. Their energy was definitely returning in response to this stimulation.

Ray’s hand reaching to touch Benton – tentatively caressing places where he’d already confidently massaged his friend – and Benton quite happily letting him. Eventually Suzanne murmured, ‘You two don’t have to pay all your attention to me, you know.’

‘You complaining, Suze?’ Ray asked, not lifting his head from her breasts.

‘Maybe I am, Vecchio.’

‘Better do something about that, then,’ the cop said. Though his intent seemed to be only that she would be too inundated by their combined attentions to be able to complain.

This time Ray was the one to bury his face in her nether regions, and sort his tongue through all her secrets. Benton concentrated on her shapely breasts and hard nipples, alternately sucking and nibbling and licking as inspiration took him. She lay there on her back between them, soaking up the pleasure, with a hand on each of them to communicate her gratitude.

And Ray reached up to drag one of Benton’s hands down to where he worked. A blunt whispered instruction – ‘Fuck her with your finger.’ And Benton did so, thrusting slow and deliberate into her wet warmth, finding the best gliding angle to tease her with. And Benton was being tantalised as well, for Ray’s tongue occasionally flicked around the base of Benton’s finger as he possessed Suzanne, provoking the most confusing of images.

Mouth still busy at the woman’s breasts, Benton at first didn’t realise what Ray’s next idea was. He was first alerted to it by Suzanne’s surprised gasp, her body lifting in a tense arch. One of Ray’s hands was busy beyond his, crowding Benton deliciously, working in the same movements only further around between Suzanne’s excitedly damp thighs –

 _Oh_ , Benton thought. It seemed that Ray was also possessing her. And, judging by Suzanne’s expression, she was surprised by the notion, but rather amenable to it. In fact, this seemed to be the sensation that tipped her over into completion, for Benton had barely gathered himself enough to return to his allotted tasks when pleasure crashed through her. Satisfaction was evident in her unrestrained cries, in her body’s fervour, the vehement arch she created before falling back spent to the bed.

The men were patient, lying beside her and holding their lover gently, though speaking for himself Benton was eager to seek his own completion again. It had been all too long since he’d had anything like this, all too long a period of abstinence. And, frankly, it might be all too long before the opportunity presented itself again.

Eventually Suzanne opened her eyes and smiled at them both, no doubt sensing the selfishness in their hearts. ‘Your turn,’ she said.

‘Whose turn?’ Ray asked, as breathless with hunger as Benton felt. The cop looked across at the Mountie, and read him through and through. ‘Yeah, all right. Benny’s turn.’

Some remnant of decency inside him protested, though Benton remained silent as Ray once again deftly rolled a condom onto him. And then Suzanne was pushing Benton down onto his back, and straddling him, just as they’d begun this – seemed like that first careful kiss was a lifetime ago. Slowly taking him into herself. She was wet, but she held him snugly – and he wondered if that was because she had been thoroughly satisfied now, for earlier when she was still full of her own need she had found his possession easier.

At last he was wholly within her, though wary of moving for fear of hurting her over-sensitised flesh. So he gazed up and drank in the sight of her – and blessed her with all his heart when she began rocking gently to and fro.

Ray was there, sitting beside them both, running a comforting hand down Suzanne’s back. ‘God, you are so beautiful,’ he was murmuring to her again and again, and she seemed caught in the tender spell he wove. Her head fell back, and then rolled to one side and forward, her golden-brown hair spilling and flowing like a bolt of silk unfurling. ‘You are so damned beautiful, Suzanne Chapin, so very beautiful.’

Benton ran his hands up the fronts of her thighs, and she leaned forward until their mouths met and meshed.

A desperate groan from Ray. ‘Oh, Suze,’ he said. ‘Tell me no if you want, but God I want to fuck you now. While you’re fucking Benny. Like we were doing with our fingers.’

Silence for a moment. Benton looked up at Suzanne’s face. She had closed her eyes as she gave this suggestion due consideration, but soon she opened them, met Benton’s gaze directly, and said, ‘All right.’

‘Are you sure?’ _Are you sure?_ Did both of the men ask that? Benton was certainly thinking it, though he couldn’t feel the residual shape of even a whisper in his mouth.

‘Do it, Vecchio.’

She stilled those tiny rocking movements, and tucked her head down on Benton’s chest, waiting for Ray to ready himself. Benton drew her hair aside, and watched his friend – at last permitted himself to look at Ray in his nakedness.

And the man was indeed beautiful. Slim, and finely muscled, with those shoulders even wider in proportion to his waist than was evident in the loose suits Ray wore. Pale skin darkening to _café au lait_ at his nipples and where the sun had touched him. Dark hair in virile scatterings across his chest and down his stomach. His phallus rising proud and hard, long and elegant, in a graceful curve – Benton took a breath and shifted his gaze down to those long and elegant thighs. Looked up to meet Ray’s slightly crazed gaze as the man finished dealing with another condom.

‘Be careful,’ Benton couldn’t help but advise.

Ray nodded, and shifted to kneel behind Suzanne, between Benton’s legs.

‘Of course he’ll be careful, Ben,’ Suzanne murmured against his chest. ‘Ray Vecchio is the gentlest man I’ve ever met.’

‘Yes, he is,’ Benton agreed, thinking of all he knew about this man. His body’s memory recalling those soft city-hands massaging his aches away. Visceral image of witnessing Ray’s passion for Suzanne, and the tenderness with which he nevertheless treated her. And all that love in Ray’s heart, all that generous love. ‘Yes, he is a gentle man.’

And Ray began pushing inside of her. An eternity of Benton soothing Suzanne with the lightest of caresses, stroking her hair and the fine skin of her back, lifting his head to press kisses to her beautiful face. All the while surreptitiously watching Ray, beautiful in his urgency for this act, in his desperately grasped control. Ray’s eyes closed as if even the sight of Suzanne might provoke him to carelessness. Those softly-skinned hands at her hips for balance, wandering across the small of her back, occasionally brushing against Benton’s hands.

When the man had accomplished his goal, those dark-hazel eyes opened and directly met Benton’s gaze. Ray was at the very limits of pleasure, teetering on the edge – that beautiful face was flushed, the mouth parted to draw quick shallow breaths, those eyes luminous. Intense. Those kiss-swollen lips shaped the name _Benny_ , and Ray shuddered.

It hit Benton then. What they were doing really hit him – he and Ray both in possession of this woman. Together. He couldn’t decide if it was the wildest of acts, or the most sophisticated. It didn’t even matter. Benton and his best friend sharing this most incredible of pleasures, that was what mattered. And the beautiful Suzanne gifting them both –

‘Suze love,’ Ray said hoarsely. ‘You OK?’

‘Yes,’ she said. And she began those tiny devastating rocking movements again.

Benton let out a groan, fearing how lost he’d be. Intense, too intense.

Ray apparently felt much the same way, for he choked out, ‘God, this will break all known speed records.’

‘Do it, Vecchio.’

Suzanne feverish in Benton’s arms. He didn’t move, wary of upsetting their tentative rhythms – and he was receiving more than enough stimulation in any case. Ray shakily thrusting in half-time, augmenting Suzanne’s moves. Benton’s hands sliding down to her hips, Ray’s hands meeting his in desperate grasp, their fingers interlocking now –

Ray giving a raw shout as his climax took him, seguing into groans that sounded agonised. The rhythm of it was gone, but Benton didn’t need anything more, for the pleasure fell from Ray through Suzanne and into him while he lay there – molten lava filling him up for long hot moments, and then draining peacefully away. It was the most involving and the most unfocussed orgasm he’d ever had.

There was nothing more to be said. They shared a hug, Suzanne still caught between the two men, clutching each other up as close as their depleted strength allowed. Taking turns to stagger out of Ray’s bed and down the hall to the bathroom, laughing a little at themselves and each other as they moved around like eighty-year-olds. And then they cuddled up together again under the quilt, and there was nothing more to be done except fall deeply asleep.

♦

Benton woke lying on his own, the quilt pushed aside – the bed had been far too warm for him, though that might be due to an on-going fever. Ray and Suzanne, on the other hand, were curled up in each other’s arms, with the quilt bunched up around their ears. Diefenbaker wasn’t helping, for he was stretched across the foot of the bed, providing a further source of heat.

It took Benton a while to sit up, careful not to disturb his companions or his own aches and pains. He headed for the bathroom, and met his body’s usual morning demands. And then he worked his way through a series of stretches, tugging and teasing at the hurts in his muscles until they eased.

When he returned to the bedroom, he found that Ray and Suzanne were awake and lazily kissing. ‘Good morning,’ he said from the doorway, wondering if he should tactfully retire.

‘Hey, Benny,’ Ray said easily. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘I am well, thank you.’

‘Good. Get back in here, will you?’

Suzanne chuckled. ‘Don’t get too many ideas, though, constable. I have to draw the line somewhere – I don’t do wolves.’

‘Oh,’ Benton said, and he frowned confusedly at Diefenbaker who slumbered oblivious.

Ray was laughing. ‘Now that’s a damned shame,’ he said. ‘I like wolves, but I never thought there’d be any-three I could do that with…’

‘Will you shut up, detective?’ Suzanne asked – and she kissed him when he wouldn’t stop snickering.

‘I’ll take Dief down to the kitchen,’ Benton offered.

‘No, Benny, leave him be, the poor thing’s actually had a decent bed for the night. As for you, get in here and keep Suzanne warm while I go pay the water bill.’

A moment before he caught Ray’s reference – Benton grimaced in distaste at the cheerful crudity, and obediently slid under the quilt. Suzanne turned to cuddle up to him as Ray left. ‘How are you really, Ben?’ she whispered.

‘Fine,’ he replied.

‘You seem kind of sad. You did last night, too. Are you going to regret this?’

‘No. No, I certainly won’t regret this.’ And they kissed, which was very pleasant, though it was strange being just the two of them. ‘Thank you,’ Benton murmured against her throat.

Ray returned, and Suzanne left. Discomfort, for Ray didn’t move easily into Benton’s arms the way Suzanne had. The two men lay there in silence for a horribly long moment, not touching at all, and then Ray sighed. ‘Ah, Benny. I should be used to letting go by now.’

‘Would you like me to leave?’ Benton asked while he could. ‘I’m sure you’d like to spend some time alone with Suzanne.’

‘No, I don’t want you to go. Don’t you understand anything?’ Ray sounded rather upset – and Benton was surprised by that, though he couldn’t understand why when he thought about it. Of course Ray was finding Suzanne’s imminent departure difficult. ‘I want you to stay, OK? You’re part of this, too.’

‘I’m sorry, Ray.’

‘ _Sorry_? What for?’

The two of them looked at each other across a wide gulf. Benton began wondering what he was talking about, and what Ray was talking about, for surely they were two different topics and he didn’t understand either of them.

Suzanne returned, and eased the difficulty by physically filling that gap between the men and cuddling them both. A lovely half-hour passed in the undemanding simplicity of touching and kissing. Nice to discover that people could relate to each other like this. Benton had begun to fear that most adults in this situation would be very… goal-oriented.

‘You’re falling down on the job, Vecchio,’ Suzanne said at last.

‘Oh, Lord,’ Ray said in despair. ‘The woman’s insatiable. I knew I should have had those vitamin shots last month.’ He fell away to sprawl on his back. ‘Benny, my man – if you’re up to it, you go right ahead.’

Suzanne laughed. ‘ _Breakfast_ , you idiot,’ she said. ‘I don’t want your body, I want to be fed.’

‘Ah, _that_ I can do.’

Benton watched as his friend clambered out of bed, and searched through the closet for two fresh robes. Ray himself shrugged into the one Benton had worn the previous night. It was obvious that Ray was ready and able to make love again – Benton worried over why his friend wasn’t willing. What had seemed possible and simple – if unique – last night, was beginning to feel complicated in the light of day. It would be a great pity if they couldn’t approach the aftermath of this adventure with grace, for Benton wanted this morning to bode well for Ray and Suzanne finding contentment again should she return. Not to mention wanting himself and Ray to be able to continue their friendship unabated, which as far as Benton was concerned was the most precious thing in Chicago.

They achieved some measure of comfort again once the three of them were in the kitchen. Benton was told to sit down and rest himself – and he didn’t argue. Suzanne made a round of coffee, and sat there with him, sipping from her mug. Ray cheerfully began making them a cheese omelette and toast, and worked on squeezing some fresh orange juice whenever he had a free moment. They didn’t talk much, but Suzanne lifted her bare feet to Benton’s lap, and he began massaging them, making it up as he went along, remembering what Ray had done for him and applying it here.

Breakfast was as delicious in its own way as dinner had been. Afterwards Benton was finally permitted to take his turn at making a round of coffee, and the three of them sat in silence over their steaming mugs. And then of course the men let Suzanne have the first shower.

All too soon the special agent was packed and ready to leave. Calling for a car to collect her. Business-like in her suit and high-heels. Benton felt quite panicked, though he could think of nothing to do to ease Ray’s hurt.

Suzanne blessed Benton with a farewell hug as Ray was bringing the last of her luggage downstairs, and Benton found himself gathering her up with all his strength. ‘But he loves you,’ Benton whispered in a confused plea.

Placing a hand either side of his face, she lifted his head so that she could meet his gaze. ‘Ben – he loves you, too, OK?’ she replied, expression serious.

Before he could try to understand what she was conveying, Ray was there. And Suzanne was out of Benton’s arms, and Ray was kissing her with all his passion. Smiling at her when she at last broke away – making the effort to smile happily at her. So brave, this man. ‘You take care,’ Ray said gently.

‘You, too, Ray.’ And the car was outside. A confusion of luggage, and a last kiss for Ray. ‘Next time, Ben.’ And then the two men were left alone on the sidewalk.

Ray’s home seemed empty and dark now. Difficult. Bereft of tawny silk. Benton wandered, aimlessly following Ray into the kitchen. ‘I’m sorry,’ he murmured.

‘ _Sorry_ again!’ Ray glared at him. ‘Why the hell do you keep saying that?’

Benton stared at his friend, not having expected anger – though he probably should have. People often seemed to cover up their vulnerabilities by going on the attack.

‘For Christ’s sake,’ Ray was muttering as he ran a sink-full of water for the washing up. ‘Just tell me what you’re sorry about, Fraser, and let’s get this sorted out.’

‘Ray –’

‘Maybe I’m the one who should be sorry – is that it?’

Benton blinked. ‘Are you?’ he asked.

‘No, I’m damned well _not_ sorry. Unless that – Well,’ Ray eventually continued with more discomfort than anger, ‘unless that hurt you. Doing that with us. Then I’d be sorry. If it hurt you. Or hurt you and me.’

‘It didn’t hurt me,’ Benton said.

‘Good.’

Ray had turned his back, plunged his hands into the soapy water, dealing with the breakfast plates with more vigour than was strictly necessary. Benton located a fresh tea towel, and began assisting his friend. By the time he was drying the omelette pan the silence between them had become a little more comfortable.

‘I’m kind of sorry about one thing,’ Ray eventually said. His tone seemed genuinely regretful, and reassuringly quiet.

‘What is that, Ray?’ Benton asked.

‘You didn’t kiss me when you had the chance.’

‘Oh.’

‘You never kissed me, Benny, you didn’t once kiss me. In fact, you hardly touched me.’

‘And you wanted me to touch you?’

‘Yes.’ So much resentment in that one word.

Benton watched his friend for a while as Ray began wiping down the kitchen benches. He honestly hadn’t expected this, wasn’t feeling at all prepared to deal with it. So perhaps it was time to be as brave as Ray, to be that open about how he felt. Difficult. Very difficult, but Benton eventually said, ‘I wanted that, too.’

‘Huh.’ That seemed intended to convey disbelief.

How to convince the man? Perhaps examples would suffice. ‘When I was first making love with Suzanne, when she was sitting in my lap. You were sitting behind her, with your mouth at her neck. I wanted to run my hand over your head, and feel your hair tickle my palm.’

‘You did?’

‘Yes. And then when I was pleasuring her with my tongue, while you were making love with her. I wanted to pleasure you with my tongue at the same time.’

Ray was staring at him, leaning back against the kitchen table as if he might fall down but for its support. The cop’s face was flushed. ‘How can you talk about it like that? Don’t talk to me like that, Benny.’

‘I wanted to cuddle you this morning, when Suzanne wasn’t there.’

‘No.’ Ray shook his head, denying him. ‘If you really wanted me, how the hell can you be so cool about it now?’

Benton closed his eyes for a moment. ‘I am not at all cool about it, Ray, I assure you. I haven’t been cool about you or Suzanne or anything else since I lay there on your bed last night while you gave me a massage.’ A pause to take a breath, to meet his friend’s gaze. ‘Your fine hands massaging me, while your thighs gripped my hips. I was not feeling _cool_ during that experience, nor through the rest of the night.’

‘Oh God,’ Ray groaned in utter despair. ‘So why didn’t you?’

‘Why didn’t I what?’

‘Touch me. Kiss me.’

‘Well, you didn’t kiss me, either, Ray.’

The cop groaned again, reached a shaky hand to pull out a chair – that long slim body folded down into it, and Ray’s beautiful face dropped into his own hands. ‘I didn’t think you wanted me to,’ Ray mumbled in explanation. ‘I thought you were only interested in Suzanne. And taking the chance of doing something a bit weird.’

Benton said, ‘I was interested in both of you.’

‘Oh God, I stuffed this up badly.’

‘Well, Ray,’ Benton said with all the courage he could muster, ‘it seems that we have learned from it.’

‘Yeah, great, I learned I should have taken the risk. What a waste. It could have been –’ The cop abruptly quit talking, and glared up at Benton instead. Stood up again, and began wiping down the kitchen table.

‘I _am_ sorry about that, Ray. Perhaps we both should have been a little braver. From what Suzanne said, she would have liked that, too.’

Ray muttered, ‘Enough, Benny.’

‘I beg your pardon?’

A return of the cop’s anger. ‘I said, that’s enough! Damn you – I stuffed it up, I don’t need a fucking post-mortem as well.’

Benton felt completely at a loss. ‘I don’t understand.’

‘Go tell someone who cares.’

That felt worse than any of the punches Benton had suffered through the previous morning. ‘If you didn’t care, Ray,’ he said as evenly as possible, ‘you wouldn’t be pushing me away like this.’

‘Yeah, right.’ And it seemed, unbelievably, as if Ray now intended to walk out of the kitchen and leave this discussion behind.

Benton was, however, absolutely certain that both of them had completely missed something of great significance. ‘It felt so dangerous,’ he said quickly. ‘The urge to touch you felt like the most dangerous thing I could ever do.’

Perhaps he had snagged Ray’s curiosity, for the cop slowed to a halt, though his back remained turned to Benton.

‘You’re my best friend, Ray. The closest friend I’ve ever had.’

‘So?’

‘Well –’ Benton cast about him for the words. ‘I’d like to stay in Chicago, Ray.’

An angry shrug. ‘You said that last night, you said you weren’t going back to Canada any time soon.’

‘I’d like to stay with _you_ , Ray.’

The longest moment stretched. Ray slowly turned around, turned his head first to stare at Benton – and then his shoulders and the rest of his limber body followed. The cop considered the Mountie for what seemed like an eternity. At last Ray asked, ‘Do you have any idea what that means to me?’

‘No,’ Benton said. ‘Yes.’

‘Which is it?’

‘Please, Ray, I’m not –’

‘Come on, Benny. You’re not stupid, you’ve been paying attention. You know what those words mean to me. So why are you using them?’

Benny found himself letting out a nervous laugh. Wishing he had his stetson with him so he could work his hands around the brim. How undignified this bravery thing felt. ‘It just occurred to me, Ray, that I already love you a great deal.’

‘As a friend,’ Ray said, seeking or providing clarification.

‘Yes. And I wonder if – That is, I suspect that if I _had_ kissed you last night, Ray, I would have fallen in love with you, too.’

‘Damn you to hell and back, Benny.’

Another full swing against the heart of him. Benton felt quite winded.

Ray said, ‘So that’s why you didn’t.’

‘It wouldn’t have been fair to Suzanne,’ Benton offered.

‘No, you bastard! Don’t make her your excuse. You just didn’t want to let your guard down that far.’

‘Fallen very much in love with you,’ Benton explained. ‘If I’d have kissed you. Perhaps without it. Can I kiss you now, Ray? To make sure.’

The man hadn’t been expecting that. ‘What?’

‘If we tried now –’ Benton took a breath. ‘Suzanne told me you love me, Ray. Is this what she meant?’

‘She saw this already?’

‘Yes.’

‘Is that what you want? Ah, damn…’ There was surprise on the cop’s face. Fear mingled with eagerness. And sadness for some strange reason. ‘Ah, damn it, Benny. Come here and kiss me, then.’

‘If we –’ But Benton abruptly lost his nerve. He backed up against the kitchen bench, needing the support of it.

‘What?’ Ray was approaching now, frowning at Benton, Ray’s arms wrapped protectively across his own chest. ‘What’s wrong?’ Waiting for an answer, staying a careful metre away.

‘If we try this now, can we do it without the anger, Ray? Can we do it without the fear?’

‘I don’t know,’ the man replied with a humourless chuckle. ‘It’s sure scaring the hell out of me.’

‘But you’re the brave one.’

Another chuckle, easier this time. ‘God bless you for seeing the best of me, Benny.’ Ray stepped closer, turning to face the kitchen bench, leaning up against it. They were side by side now, but facing in opposite directions. After a long moment, Ray’s hand crept over to find Benton’s where it hung by his side – their fingers tangled desperately as if they had a life of their own.

Benton took a deep breath, letting it calm him, took another. He really should have seen this coming. Now that he was in the thick of it, now he was standing right in the middle of loving Ray Vecchio, it seemed strange that Benton hadn’t been aware of the beginning of the emotion. Perhaps it had bloomed unnoticed from the solid foundation of their friendship, inspired by all the wonderful things that Ray was, nourished by the thousand kindnesses Ray did Benton every day. Warmed last night by Ray’s soft hands, heated by all the urges Benton had resisted. And it had finally been brought to Benton’s attention by a woman who loved Ray for his gentleness.

‘Benny?’

‘Yes, Ray?’ he asked in the same hushed tones.

‘How are you feeling?’

A moment before Benton could say it, even now. ‘I’m feeling as if I love you, Ray.’

‘That’s good, Benny. That’s very good.’

‘Yes, Ray.’

Time eased by, and their hands held each other with increasing tenderness and confidence.

‘Benny?’

‘Yes?’

‘Could you kiss me now, do you think?’

‘Yes, Ray.’ And Benton Fraser turned his head to look at his friend, his best friend. This beautiful man, so full of all the most valuable things life had to offer. Ray Vecchio was looking back at him, a little nervous but so open to him, those dark-hazel eyes luminous. Benton leaned in and met that lovely mouth with his own.

Incredible. Ray so giving, so loving, so completely undemanding. So light and delightful – with the promise of dark and wicked lurking back there whenever Benton might want it. So sweet and pure and clever and funny all at once, and why on earth did Ray have such a poor opinion of himself? This was the most involving and the most seductive kiss Benton Fraser had ever had – and that was because it was the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth of Raymond Vecchio.

Eventually Ray tilted his head back so that he could meet Benton’s gaze. ‘Is it working?’ he asked. ‘Is the kiss working? Are you falling in love with me?’

‘Oh, yes, Ray. No doubt about it.’

The most contented of smiles settled through Ray, flowing down through all of him. He had never looked more beautiful. ‘That’s good, Benny.’

‘Yes, it is, Ray. It most certainly is.’

♦


End file.
